I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
