I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
