Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
FUCK WHALES
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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