He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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