But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
