Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize