You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
