I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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