Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize