whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize