do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
