Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
