We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
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Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
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We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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