Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
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