This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
When did angry sex become our thing?
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
