I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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