My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
where does the pee come out of this thing
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Randomize
