There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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