I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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