They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
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She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
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I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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