sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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