In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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