I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
handjob tips. give me some.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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