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I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
MIDGETS
????
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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