walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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