Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
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