I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
And then my night got REAL pukey
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
