i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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