tell your sister to shave her snatch
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Congratulations! We have a period
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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