She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
