The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize