I'm going to jail i love you
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
