Pregnant stripper...not hot.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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