she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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