I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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