Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
