then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
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