I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
