Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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