Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Randomize
