I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize