Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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