i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
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