I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
