i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Randomize
