a queef is a wish your heart makes.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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