I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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