It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
