my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
