Ambien. No doubt about it.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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