If that was your dad, he is hot
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
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