I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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